It's a beautiful war

My dearest,

They say three years marks what is called the "three-year itch: the make or break of a relationship". This is when a couple who has been in a relationship for three years decides on one out of two choices: (1) end the relationship; or (2) make things work.

Our arguments during the past week had been one of the toughest and most arduous fights that we have ever had. It was an incredible challenge that made us both think why we choose to stay. You said,

And i remembered the times we were together. remembered feeling you, bathing you. Going out and walking with you beside me. Piggy backing you. Kissing you and making love to you. Waking up each morning and able to hug you and go back to sleep. Rubbing my face all over your face. Doing what we did with you again. Even you getting annoyed with me for rushing you in the rain cause of your wet, uncomfortable socks.

I choose to stay because of our memories together. All of those things that you said. I want to feel the hair on your arms, on your chest, in your head, on your face... I always want to hear your baritone voice; admire your long lashes and your big round eyes. More importantly, I choose to stay because you're good to me and I appreciate that. You're intelligent, wise, sweet, caring, and hard working. And I appreciate all of these things. Sometimes, we might forget what we mean to each other and the other good things we have together in the hatred of the moment, but we always find our way back through the little things we love about each other.

"The beginning of love is the will to let those we love be perfectly themselves, the resolution not to twist them to fit our own image. If in loving them we do not love what they are, but only their potential likeness to ourselves, then we do not love them: we only love the reflection of ourselves we find in them"

It wasn't right for me to ask you to be open; to be more patient; or to be anything else but yourself. I cannot forgive myself for demanding these things. I've always told myself that I won't be that kind of person (even in my journals - I found my old blog). I'm deeply sorry, love. I'm sorry for being such a pain in your ass. But I've learned.

I don't love you because I need you; I need you because I love you.

If we want to change someone, I believe being in an example to the person and showing them how instead of telling them is more effective. We set the example and give them the freedom to choose whether or not they want to be more like you. As for me, I always see how hard you work at anything you do, and that made me want to work hard as well - with my work, my workouts, and especially our relationship. You also make me want to be a better person. A hardworking one.

To end, I would like to dedicate this song for you: